Today I came across a story that seemed similar to my own. The absolute denial that I had depression. When I first started to struggle with my mood I could not admit to anyone, not even myself that I may be depressed. You can not start to deal with your depression if you are spending all your time trying to prove that you are not! When I was referred to the mental health team I spent many a session trying to convince them & myself that it must be something else. Something we were missing.
It took me a long time to get the place I am at now.
I still have bad days. Everyone has bad days, but I need medication to help me through mine.
I need to go to bed at the right time, make sure I am eating a balanced diet, get enough fresh air, enough exercise & talk about my feelings just in order to get through the week in one piece.
I wasn't sure I was strong enough when I started my blog. Confident enough to put myself out there. Strong enough to talk about my struggles.
This week I proved - I am.
I wrote about my achievements here & I sent a post to Black Dog Tribe (a campaign run by SANE - a mental health charity) to be shared with others.
The 'Black Dog' is a metaphor for depression. By calling it 'the black dog' it definitely allows me to speak more openly & honestly about feelings of depression, despair, suicide, loneliness & asking for help. Exactly what the campaign is all about.
black dog, Bailey, is my rock but I couldn't get through this without my husband. So the post I put forward was about him also dealing with depression, my depression. I am very proud of his words and him.
Today I also feel proud of me. Proud that I am indeed dealing with my depression & I hope my words here can be some hope for anyone else trying to tame the black dog.
Start dealing with depression I know you can.
Love Mrs Brown xx