Sunday 9 September 2012

Mood roller coaster of life

I hate roller coasters.  I hate the feeling in your tummy, I hate feeling out of control and that scared sickly feeling just doesn't do it for me.

My mood recently seems to be on it's own roller coaster and I feel like I'm being dragged along for the ride.  The ride that is my life.

I've had days where I am excited, even go so far as to say happy.  But it never seems to last.  I am well aware that moods change.  They have to.  Life would just be down right crazy if we all just lived on one level.  We wouldn't experience the highs but we wouldn't experiences the lows either.

Today I write from a Mrs Brown shaped dent in the sofa.  I have been tossing and turning, up & down but no energy, nothing, always heading back to the sofa for some comfort.

As a was riding a high following my courage at the dentist, I appear to have developed an infection.  The constant agony and clock watching as to when I can take more pain killers has taken it's toll on me.

I have slipped back into useless mode.  Poor hubby, poor dog, I've got coping strategies now right? What do you do when you can't face them?

As I opened the mac (which strangely has been closed for past few days) I find it nice to have the blog to get these thoughts out my head.

I do however feel apologetic that this is a very negative piece.  If it helps, and it's safe, why not?

Mr B called from his travels and I said I had nothing to say, but I can write a post he said?  I know that hurts him, it is not meant to.  I don't want to pass on the negativity, I don't want to let him down, I don't want him to worry.  So instead I write.  Not in private but instead I put it out into the space that is the world wide web, in a tiny hope someone may understand or that they may want to know.

As I re-read this, I learn what I feel I have to learn from this post, this feeling, I need to change my perspective.  I can either scream (or sit on the sofa moping) or just hold on tight and try enjoy the ride.

I'll try, throw my hands up and lean into the twists and turns.

Do you feel the highs and lows of the roller coaster that is life?

Let me know how you deal with the coaster, Mrs Brown xx



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2 comments:

  1. If I'm having a down day I find sorting my clothes/shoes/make up really sorts me out I hate cleaning with a passion but I find tidying up the clothes I love it really cheers me up very strange I know. I'm sure your hubby wants to hear your downs so he can support you xx

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    1. Such a good idea! I did find myself sifting through paper work today and it's nice sorting things. Not too taxing and feels productive!

      So going through my clothes sounds good. Good strategy thanks xx

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